Here, have a clue

There are some people that don’t know what’s going on with my knees (yes, plural) but with my right one being much much worse.  I have arthritis in my knees, it’s a family trait. But, when I was 18 I injured my right knee, and about 18months after that, I developed degenerative arthritis in it.  It’s been giving me trouble off and on for 40 years. My right knee has a head start on the left.

An accident last October pushed the remaining meniscus out, turning it from being an annoyance, to a borderline crippling injury. I have NO cartilage between my femur and tibia/fibula. None. That means I had bone on bone grinding when I was walking around, for months before I got to see a specialist.

Yes, I have had two rounds of drain the fluid, and synovial injections. I am on a ‘diet’ of anti-inflammatory and Panadiene Forte (as needed) It has made it possible for me to do normal daily activities.  HOWEVER.. walking for 30 or more minutes on uneven paving, or a walkway that slants down towards the street is a tad uncomfortable, the way giving birth is a slight pressure. 

I’m lucky if I get 3 uninterrupted hours of sleep at night. It’s more like I take 2 naps at night, which means my ass is dragging the next day.  Rinse and repeat since October LAST YEAR!

I could take the Panadiene Forte more often, but I really dislike the head packed in cotton feeling it gives me. So, I walk slow. And it f&$%ing hurts to do so… read above, about the bone on bone grinding. And my left knee is causing trouble because I am favoring my right leg. My left leg, which is still partially paralyzed/unresponsive because of nerve damage from disc collapse, isn’t handling the extra work very well, and THAT knee is starting to get worse.

You know that “On a scale of 1 to 10” for pain measurement?  I’m on a constant 3 at the very least, to “wanting to rock back and forth crying”. Add a good sized dollop of depression into the mix, and you might have an inkling of what I am going through. So, when I mention I walked for 30 mins to get somewhere, your flippant comment and eyeroll makes me want to punch you square in the face, or just scream at you.. but I do neither.  But I do wish you could feel what I’m going through for just a few weeks, see if you’d be so cavalier and flippant afterward.

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About Sandra

Passenger on a blue marble, circling yellow star. Dancer, astronomer, technogeek, coffee lover, pagan, photographer.. not necessarily in this order.
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