We now have a proper name for what is wrong: Functional Neurological Disorder. It’s not all in my head, I’m not making it up.
FDN is as common as MS and Parkinson’s with similar levels of disability and impairments with quality of life, but they don’t involve the brain. FND with me presents with: weakness, sensory changes, movement disorders, seizures, gait and balance difficulties, chronic pain, sleep disturbances.
To put it bluntly, I’m a mess. But a fixable mess. After giving her the traumatic/stress filled* events I’ve had just in the past 5 years alone, it’s a wonder my body didn’t rebel earlier.
Having to be brutally honest about things goes against how I was raised. It was “If asked, don’t tell”. No joke. To discuss thing that I had kept deliberately buried, had me in tears. Not of shame of what happened, but shame for TELLING someone. Go figure!
*those in the know know what a shit storm it’s been.